2020 is just 2 days away and I am having mixed emotions for it. Although I will wake up the same way on the morning of January 1, 2020, as I do now, yet there is a timid nervousness budding inside me at the thought of what and what not will happen. But more than that, I can’t stop recalling the highlights of 2019.
Talking about it, this year taught me a lot in a way or the other. From starting the year on a rough emotional note to ending it cheerfully, I am glad to have met and crossed paths with each and every person.
The first quarter involved a lot of stress, fights, and emotional trauma, of course. I had my board exams at this time preceded by a school farewell and followed by me taking up a content writing internship at Kota City Blog-a community I fell in love with as soon as I joined it.
The next quarter was a turning point and involved a lot of stress and anxiety. I was mostly stressed about my board result and getting into a good university. But this wasn’t the most tiring part, the most tiring part was to figure out what I want to do in life(which is not yet sorted), to decide what course I want to pursue and most importantly to not feel worthless about myself.
There were also days when I would feel nothing but suicidal. Things did sort out pretty well, I would say and I am thankful to a bunch of people who made me feel better.
The last two quarters were happy ones. with the onset of my college life, I moved to Mumbai to pursue my bachelor's. I made great friends, I had someone to witness the sunset at marine drive with(we still do it), I felt good for most parts of the day and even when I used to be at my lows, I wasn’t as vulnerable as I used to be and also I witnessed my 18th birthday this October. I also learned to stay without my family, learned to accept the changes in life and keep going.
The thing this year made me believe in is that things do get better and sorted out with time, provided, you give enough time to them.
Also, I realized I don’t ever run away from my emotions no matter how worse they get. There’s one more thing I believe in now- one always gets what he wants providing he wants it desperately(yup the Om Shanti Om dialogue).
There’s still a lot to learn and experience, to gain and lose, to seek and explore and I am all set for it.
A very Happy New Year to everyone reading this. Sending hugs to all of you and a ray of hope to those who witnessed a bad year this time.
Doodles!
